Five Relationship Essentials For Women
BY DR. LAWANDA N. EVANS
Many of us have experienced ups and downs in relationships. You may have endured one or several failed relationships. Maybe dating has resulted in short-term unhealthy connections. You are certainly not alone. Many of us have had similar experiences, including myself. However, like most women, you may be asking yourself, “Will I ever have a good relationship? Is a healthy, lasting relationship or marriage even possible?” These are questions that linger for women who would value a meaningful partnership, but have been unsuccessful. I believe there are many factors that impact our ability to find and build a satisfying partnership.
When seeking a lasting love relationship, it’s important to understand building a healthy connection begins with you. Sometimes, we neglect our own emotional issues from past or present relationships, ignore our insecurities, and have unrealistic expectations of both the relationship and how it should be. There are five areas that women should understand before beginning a new partnership.
1. Love Yourself First
It’s difficult to build a relationship with someone else when you are struggling to love yourself. Often, women may focus on their imperfections, compare themselves to others, discount their strengths and abilities, and question their worth. It’s not fair to yourself or your potential partner to go into a relationship expecting to be loved when you are unable to care for yourself. Before you begin dating, learn to make decisions that support you physically, mentally, and emotionally. Develop a list of positive affirmations that reinforce your strengths and empower you to succeed. Seek out therapy and support from friends. The bottom line is you deserve to be loved exactly the way you are, but you must first offer it to yourself.
2. Know Who You Are
It’s difficult to build a relationship with someone else when you are unclear about who you are. Do you change your clothing, behavior, thoughts, personality, and feelings in order to win the acceptance of others? Whose opinion is most valuable? Do you only see your worth through the way friends perceive you? It’s not fair to go into a relationship expecting honesty when you have a false sense of who you are.
3. Have A Healthy Self-Perception
It’s difficult to build a relationship with someone else when your self- perception is distorted and you have difficulty seeing past your imperfections. Of course, self-improvement is an effective way of feeling good about yourself. However, it’s important to first see your own beauty. Focusing primarily on your flaws and trying to cover them can leave you feeling dissatisfied. Sometimes you have to look yourself in the mirror, accept who you are, and call yourself beautiful even when you don’t feel like it or believe it. Learn to encourage yourself. It’s not fair to go into a relationship expecting your partner will make you feel better.
4. Be Whole & Fulfilled As A Single Woman
It’s difficult to build a relationship with someone else when you’re broken, hurt, and needing to heal. If you are empty inside before the relationship, you will be empty within the relationship. Find help and support for your past, give yourself time to recover, and understand that no one else can fill the void. First, work on becoming a whole and fulfilled person. It’s not fair to enter a relationship with your broken and shattered pieces and expect your partner to put you back together.
5. Be Content
It’s difficult to build a relationship with someone else when you’re not at peace. Are you dissatisfied with your career, home, or love life? Instead of focusing on everything that is wrong with your current life, turn your attention to change. Find out what gives you purpose, what type of work is meaningful, and what kind of relationships enrich your life. It’s not fair to go into a partnership harboring bitterness, dissatisfaction, and unhappiness. Invest your time in creating the life you want and one that will bring you contentment. Then, your happiness will overflow into the relationship rather than draining it of life.
Relationships take time, energy, commitment, and a lot of work. Each of the five steps focuses on your individual emotional, physical, and mental health. These must be considered before you can have a great relationship with a partner. Loving yourself, accepting yourself, and knowing yourself will bring contentment with or without a romantic connection. Beginning with yourself is the very first step to finding and building a love relationship that lasts.
AUTHOR'S WEBSITE: http://www.drlne.com/